I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
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