someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
What a dumb baby whore.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
