So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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