So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
