im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Randomize
