Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
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