I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
