Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
