Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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