dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
