I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Randomize
