I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
