Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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