she kept yelling 'call me bella'
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize
