No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
