It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
