dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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