We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
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