when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Randomize