I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
