just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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