trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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