im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
