if you like me you must not know who I am
Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
