yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
