I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
