Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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