She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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