There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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