i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
