I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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