"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
