btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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