I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Randomize
