i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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