on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I have fence marks all over my body
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize