I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
