I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
