YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
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