My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
