I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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