oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I need to align my fucking chakras
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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