Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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