my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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