Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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