If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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