so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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