I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
