he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
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