The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
im holly from the hills drunk
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
