How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize
